Hi ,
In our recent letters, we talked about building the foundation of presence.
When you develop the capacity to really hold space and mindfully experience another person, what can emerge is a much bigger experience of another person than you might expect.
I sometimes call this “Listening behind the story.” It is about looking past the surface level of the person standing in front of you. Instead of just seeing their role or hearing their words, you use your senses to sense deeper. I wrote more about this in the link.
The Depth of Presence
When you practice this, you are curious about the whole human being. You wonder, “What are the key moments that shaped them?” or “Did they have a grandparent that had a meaningful impact?” You listen for what they love and what they might be struggling with in this moment.
You are holding all of these possibilities in a space of loving presence and awareness. This is not to categorize or classify, but to connect and relate.
When you engage with someone at this level, you have created a very refined sensory array within yourself. By clearing away the noise in your own internal system, you have tuned your entire system (by nature) to be highly sensitive to them, picking up on data that most people miss.
The Birth of a Hunch
This often gives rise to a zone of experience that is very interesting. In the midst of this, there can arise a hunch or an impression. These impressions are another way to talk about intuition. They are not based on a rational observation or a logical thought. You have no rational reason to suspect something is so, but the question is still there.
They just hang out in a field of curiosity.
Here are some of the questions I have had arise that proved to be true:
“Did you grow up by water?” (Grew up in a lake house literally on the water in Minnesota.) “Something about automobiles and your grandfather.” (She had a picture of her and her grandfather in a Model A car on her wall that meant a lot to her.) “What is your relationship to words?” (This came up with a physical therapist who was working with me. He literally dropped his clipboard when I asked.)
Is it Just Imagination?
Now, to be fair, I have had a lot of time to sort out how these intuitions arise in my senses and so have learned to sense when they are “not me” versus my imagination.
An untrained mind will very quickly dismiss these signals. We have been taught to think that if we cannot prove it with logic, it must be imagination or fiction.
Let’s be clear: it may very well be. Your mind is excellent at making up stories to fill in the blanks.
As Eckhart Tolle said when asked, “Can I trust my gut feelings?”, he replied, “Depends on where they are coming from.”
That was a great response.
So this leads us to the most important question: How do you know? How can you tell the difference between a real signal and a story you are making up?
We will talk about that in the next letter.
Stay present,
Brett