Hi ,
In the last letter, I shared a simple but powerful idea:
That inner critic?
It’s just an experience you have.
It’s a memory — a strategy you learned once, long ago, to stay safe.
But now, you’re not that same person.
And you don’t need that same protection.
Still, the voice can feel powerful.
Authoritative.
Convincing.
So how do you interrupt it — not with force, but with clarity?
Here’s a practice I’ve taught to many clients.
It’s deceptively simple.
And surprisingly effective.
When that inner voice shows up…
“You’re not ready.”
“Don’t say that — they’ll judge you.”
“Who do you think you are?”
Start with the first practice: noticing and naming.
“Ah, there’s the part of me that is critical and doubting. So familiar, and old, but it’s just a memory.”
Then, pause.
Take a breath.
And ask in a very objective way:
“Can I be helpful here?”
That’s it.
If the answer is no — that’s fine.
Maybe it’s not your moment.
But if the answer is yes…
Then something beautiful happens.
The frame shifts from “Am I worthy enough?”
to “I have something to contribute.”
That moves you from fear to service.
From doubt to contribution.
Because if you can be helpful and don’t… let me ask:
Why are you withholding your goodness?
Why would you keep your wisdom, your care, your insight to yourself?
Why stay silent, when your presence and perspective could make a difference?
In business, remember — they invited you to the table.
Not participating speaks volumes about the wisdom of that invitation.
At Microsoft, when I didn’t understand a process, I didn’t shy away from asking basic, clarifying questions.
Because either:
— I needed to know in order to do my job, and not asking would’ve been a missed opportunity to grow.
— Or there wasn’t clarity to begin with, and my question helped reveal something important that others hadn’t seen.
In both cases, asking helped the work — not just me.
You’re not trying to be the smartest.
Or the most polished.
You’re simply showing up — grounded, real, and present — to offer what you can, learn what you need, and be your caring self.
That’s enough.
Actually… that’s more than enough.
It’s generous. It’s courageous. It’s leadership.
This isn’t about ego — it’s about giving voice to who you are.
When you show up with clarity and presence, you’re not trying to prove something.
You’re trying to be helpful.
That changes everything.
Because if you can be helpful — and you withhold it — the cost is real.
- The room misses out on your voice.
- The conversation loses the benefit of your insight.
- The people around you don’t get the gift of your presence.
And you?
You miss the opportunity to let people see you — and learn who you are.
This is so important.
I was working with a client who was frustrated that her boss was singing the praises of her colleague at a team offsite.
She told me, “I was pretty quiet,” while her colleague made lots of contributions.
So I asked her:
“How can your manager sing your praises if you don’t give him something to sing about?”
So next time the voice rises, try this:
Pause.
Breathe.
Ask: “Can I be helpful?”
And if the answer is yes, take one more breath…
…and speak true.
Here’s your assignment: Get your voice in the room.
Even if only to say:
“I like that.”
“Good idea.”
“We found something similar in our research.”
Just let others hear from you — simply and directly.
Because you have goodness in you that the world needs more of.
Please give the world the benefit of more of it.
Stay present,
Brett
PS.
This voice shows up in many forms — doubt, comparison, perfectionism, shame. If you recognize a version of it in your own life and want support shifting that pattern, I’d be glad to help using the practices I’ve refined over time. You’re welcome to book a free 30-minute Exploring Possibilities session here: https://calendly.com/mindfulguy/introductions.